The Girl Picks & My Season Winner Pick

Good-bye Kristy Lee Cook and Alexandrea.

And how much do I adore Brooke?

Top 4: David A., Ramiele, Asia'h, and Carly.

Top 2: David A. & Ramiele

Winner: David A.

Thoughts during Breakfast for Dinner

I made eggs, bacon, and potatoes for dinner.

Bleu had his nose in the air, sniffing while wagging his tail.

It was the first dinner I had made that made him WANT people food.

Normally, I eat the table while he lays on his bed and watches me closely. (Our dining room table looks directly on his bed and vice versa.)

But tonight he begged. He paced. He rubbed my legs, dangling from the chair. He wanted bacon.

I didn't give him any. Instead I kept smiling at him and looking away, hoping it translated in dog language to "I love you, but I love my food more."

But one moment his eyes were so sweet and so sad, I was tempted to feed him bacon. I thought twice and realized that wouldn't be good.

I also thought and said to him, "If I love you more, I'd have to kill you."

It was weird. He looked so cute, so helpless, so loving. Excuse the cliche, but my heart melted. And I thought to myself, "So this is what it's like."

It's taken me 30 years of love to figure out what it's like to love a puppy. On my wedding day and each day I feel love for my husband, but love for dogs and kids. I didn't get it.

Then, suddenly, seeing Bleu beg for food, I got it. I understand why people love their pets.

But all this hoop-la about loving pets as kids means: I'm scared to have kids. If I loved them this much (as much as I love Bleu), I might beat them to death.

(No, I'm not an abuser, but just think of the PT Anderson movie Punch Drunk Love and you'll see what I mean. And think of the people who say, "You're so cute I could eat you.")

In short, so now I realize why my parents love me and want to see me all the time.

What would it be like with Grandkids???

Love. It's an f-ed up thing.

The Boy Picks

Jason Y & Luke are gone Thursday.

At least I hope.

How much do I love David A.? That kid is a natural. He gives me chills.

I promise more soon on all-things-not-Idol.

Almost.

3 out of 4 Idol Loser picks isn't too shabby.

I should have called Colton instead of Luke. I had a feeling America was as pissed as I was about Kyle not getting through...

American Idol: My Girl Picks

Top 6 Girls will be:
Carly
Alaina
Amanda
Asia'h
Ramiele
Syesha

The Two Girls Going Home Thursday:
Amy and Joanne.

My Fav Girls:
Brooke (She so pure.)
Amanda (She's totally herself.)
Carly (She's Irish.)
Ramiele (She's so cute!)

The Girls I Can't Stand:
Amy--The performance sucked so bad I'm speechless.
There's just too many blondes. They remind me of Carrie Underwood. Doesn't a girl with another image deserve to win?


Tonight I noticed more so than any other season before that the contestants are hyper-aware of their appearances and images--how they look, how they dress, their hair, their shoes, what their promotional material is like, what image they are portraying. I keep thinking this has something to do with all the self-promo we do online via Facebook, MySpace, etc. Maybe I'm over thinking Idol, but I had to share.

And do you think Britney is crazy enough to appear on Idol just to meet Kady? I DO!

Tomorrow my girl and boy picks to win.

Tonight enjoy the lunar eclipse.

American Idol: My Boy Picks

Top 6 Boys will be:
David A.
Jason C.
Michael Johns
Chikezie
David C.
Robbie

The Two Boys Going Home Thursday:
Garrett and Luke.

Yes, Simon, you were right, my husband and I had Big Question Marks above our heads during these two performances. In fact, we just Tivo-ed through them because they were so horrific.

My Fav Boys:
Jason C.
David A.
Robbie

The Boys I Can't Stand:
David Noreiga--Lose the cockiness, dude; it's too much.
Garrett--Simon's right again; you need some sun and some fresh air.
Colton--It should have been Kyle up there, not you.

Back to voting!

Confessions (Two for Tuesday)

If you've read my Twitter this morning, then you already know.

But Bleu sleeps in his kennel all night--from 11:30-6 or 7 a.m. But the past two days we've put him in bed with us from 6-8 a.m. to get some more sleep.

And we do get more sleep. It's heavenly.

But that little pig is becoming a pillow hog.

Even more honesty, though, I'm worried he'll want to sleep with us all the time and stop liking this kennel. But I know if we make the pattern just for the morning and keep the night pattern the same with his kennel, he'll be fine.

You should see him jump off the bed. It's like he's saying, "I'm done sleeping. NOW, let's eat!" It's priceless.

~

I can't stop thinking about the shootings at NIU.

I want to say something more than "I'm sorry." Or "My heart is with them." But I don't know what to say about something so horrific.

I don't understand why that kind of violence.

My confession: More and more in my role as college instructor I'm becoming paranoid about my safety, my husband's, my students', and my colleagues.

I feel like I need to become a protector in order to be a good teacher. That scares me.

No matter what fear is not going to stop me from being the best teacher I can. If anything, I'm going to use it to empower me and appreciate my students even more.

Ugh.

The title says it all.

I'm not feeling well.

Mental note: Don't buy school lunches for awhile.

I'm smart for giving up fast food 6 months ago.

Right On.

This past year was all about Rehab (think: LL & BS), so it seems fitting that "Rehab" was song of the year...

Thinking About A Lot of Stuff At Once

RIP Prince

I just found out my parents had to put down our family cat Prince unexpectedly tonight at 5:30 p.m.

I feel helpless for Pops and Hons. But I feel even worse for my sister Angie.

I know I'm shook up; I can't imagine how Ang is taking it.

I want to write more but I just can't right now...

RIP Prince 2004-2008.

Props to my bro Ross for this great picture of Prince; I know he's hurting too.

I'm Not Above Stealing Ideas

Maybe you remember my jealous post?...

If you don't, a brief recap: I was friended on Facebook by a girl I went to high school with and after viewing her profile I found out she has a kick-ass blog (she doesn't call it that, but I do.) I was jealous. Until Stokes set me straight. (Thanks, dollface!)

Plus, I've done lots of yoga and thinking since then.

I'm no longer jealous.

But, happily, I'm going to steal one of her brilliant ideas.

She's been doing self-portraits every day on her Flickr page. (Yeah, I stalk her on Flickr too...)

And I've decided I LOVE this idea. Think about it: so much happens in one minute, one hour, one day, one week, one year. Here us bloggers are documenting our lives with words (with a few YouTube videos thrown in), but self portraits? Be still my heart: how I adore Visual Rhetoric.

Really, I should get my PhD in Comp Rhet for how much I LOVE Visual Rhetoric and digital identity.

Alas, I love the money I make much, much more. (Even though, truth be told, I wish I made much, much more. LOL!)

Anyways...

It's so easy to expedite the self-portrait idea in this digital age, right? Hello, Photo Booth on Mimi the Mac (and other Macs...) And even digital cameras. (What of the new trend of taking your picture in a mirror?)

But here's my spin: to not pose. To post the first pic I take with Photo Booth. And to capture an emotion in the heat of the moment, not to try to replicate it later.

And I've been obsessed lately with feeling like I don't look good. Maybe I could debunk some of these "gross" feelings if I saw myself being natural in the moment and feeling an emotion in that moment without worrying, "A hair is out of place. Retake the photo."

So many people tell me I have a very expressive face. Shouldn't I put it to good use?

And perhaps get a good Facebook profile pic out of it...

Today's is called: "Unwinding on the internet."

Literally, I'm unwinding the internet.

I need to stop before I get more ridiculous...

Very soon I need to tell you all about my new awesome addiction: Myles Baker Street.

Snippets (Actually A Bit More Than Snippets)

Yesterday in my computer lab Composition class I tripped over some computer cords and bit the dust in front of my students. I caught myself on the wall and popped up like a puppet, laughing. They got a kick out of it too.

Apart from thinking about tripping I've been thinking about something we began talking about--digital identity. I'm sure most of you are all familiar with digital identity and digital narrative theories, but it was cool to explain it for the first time to this class of students. We've been talking a lot about Pop Culture and Technology, and yesterday was the perfect day to share with them the formal term. I pulled up my Facebook account for the whole class and explained to them that I'm only choose apps and giving details of the things I want them to know about me. I'm only presenting "the me I want people to see" on Facebook; I'm not sharing the things I might not like about myself or the things I deem private. I watched their faces as I defined this term that they were all kinda dancing around in the conversation, and I noticed several "AHA!!!!" faces. I love those teaching moments. And I really enjoy that class. The students in there are bright and motivated. They make me want to be a better teacher, scholar, and student myself.

Our class discussion, though, has me thinking a lot about Facebook. I'm totally addicted to that crazy thing. It makes it so easy to catch up with distant friends, loved ones, former students, and colleagues. I've been toying with creating student groups for my classes or developing the "Courses" app that gives classes space for a discussion board, a place to post assignment sheets, and an area to post announcements. My students seem kind of reluctant to use Facebook as an education tool. I don't blame them--at times. I think Facebook will be the new Blackbaord, but ,seriously, it's the best toy (and stalking tool) in the internet.

And while thinking about Facebook and digital identity, I've become obsessed with my Profile Picture. I can't find one that cute enough, smart enough, skinny enough: "me" enough. Either I'm having self esteem issues or I need a haircut (that always makes me feel better) or my New Year's Resolution to not buy "new" clothes has left me feeling a little under the weather.

Weather: We had several severe thunderstorms last night. It's February. We should be having blizzards. And to think there are still skeptics of global warming. Oi!

Thankfully, Bleu slept through all the lightning and thunder until one really loud rumble shook the house. Then I heard his little tags clink together as he probably raised his head (he sleeps in a kennel on the far side of master bedroom so I couldn't see him). This same rumble woke up me and FD at the same time as at the same time we said "WTF?" I imagined Bleu said it with us, and then all three of us fell back to sleep. Bleu's little tags clinking as he laid his head back down.

~

During yoga class last night I couldn't balance. Not at all. I got so pissed with myself. Seriously, how hard is it to stand on one leg with the other leg stretched out in front of you? Maybe it was my spill in class yesterday, but I just couldn't do it. And I know I can because I've done it many times before. It's been awhile since I've been frustrated like that during yoga. But I'm happy I got frustrated. It reminded me to let go and accept where I was for the day, even if that meant I was where I didn't want to be. I need constant reminders.

What I've really been enjoying this session with Megan is my mind is becoming less clogged when I practice and I'm able to draw connections between how Megan explains a pose and how I teach my students to craft an essay. Back in the day when I practiced yoga it cleared my mind to help me be receptive to words/lines/etc. for poems. I don't have that so much any more. Sometimes that scares me because I wonder if I'll ever write a poem again. But then I remind myself that I have my lyric essays which are at times hybrid enough to be poems, so why should I obsess over not writing somethings that are left-margin justified. Pigeonholing myself and writing to a certain genre in a certain style isn't cool...

Which reminds me of digital identity...like the blogs of the writers who only talk about writer-ly things. Though I respect many of these kinds of blogs, I'm skeptical of others. I'm wondering if all this digital identity isn't just perpetuating stereotypes and locking writers (and teachers) into these oversimplified personifications of their traditional roles. Aren't we all more dynamic than that?

Bleu beckons from this kennel.

Perhaps next time I'll discuss another idea I've had: "Pimp My Kennel."

Me and Julio Down by the School Yard

Bleu and Paul Simon 4-EVA!